When you think about what kind of real estate agent you want to be, you can be the flame throwing agent that blows all situations up. OR, you can be the agent that exercises some grace.
Sometimes, we all need a little grace. We need to give ourselves grace.
Have you heard of the golden rule? Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. We could use more of this in real estate and you have total control over how you handle situations. So, will you be the agent with grace, or the flame throwing agent?
I recorded a video on this (below) and wrote the text in this post separate from the email. Sooo, the words below don't necessarily match what you'll hear in the video, but the concept is the same. If you prefer to watch/listen, have at it. If you'd rather read, just scroll below the video.
Do you ever feel like a complete failure because you're not perfect? Because your sales weren't as good as someone else's?
Give yourself some grace. {If you're not sure what I mean by grace, you can read up on the definition here.}
You're not perfect. I'm not perfect. NO ONE IS PERFECT.
So, give yourself some grace. It is OK that you're not perfect. It's OK that you're learning the real estate business and becoming a better agent every day.
And, you might also think about your colleagues and how THEY might also deserve some grace. Honestly, this world would be a better place if WE ALL gave people a little more grace. It's so simple!
For example...
For example, let's say that you have a listing contract with a seller. The listing is on the MLS, the house is for sale and you're just doing your thing waiting for an offer.
Out of the blue, your seller contacts you - and they're upset.
Turns out, they were interviewing other agents before they decided to hire you. Ok, that's normal. But, one of the agents they interviewed was the agent that helped them buy the house. And, that agent thought the seller was going to list with them.
Naturally, the seller didn't even tell the other agent they didn't get the job. Oops. So, when the other agent sees their house listed on the MLS, they have a knee jerk reaction and send your seller a text.
"I just saw your house is listed for sale on the MLS and I am so surprised because I thought we were working together. I'm so confused, my feelings are hurt - can you please tell me what I did to lose your business?"
Ugh.
Turns out the seller is upset by this message and they're contacting you to make it all better. (Isn't that what we do? Make it all better...)
So, what do you do?
I think about the sellers. I'm not sure why they're so upset (obviously, they could have avoided this by simple communication) but they are. Perhaps they don't know what to say to the other agent. Maybe they're worried they did something wrong by choosing to list with you. Who knows?
Regardless of whether or not the other agent should have sent your seller a message... they did. And, now it's your problem to resolve. So, whatcha gonna do?
Honestly, it's SO easy to be the person that throws gasoline on the fire. If the seller is upset, maybe you want to validate their feelings and agree "how dare that agent contact you?!??!" or "we should file a complaint!", but does that truly accomplish anything?
AND, if you do use your flame thrower, I wonder how that seller is going to feel when the situation has passed. Will they feel like they wasted some time and energy on something that's sort of silly in the first place? Will they wonder why you let them get so riled up? What will they think about you then?
So, you could stay calm. And think through the situation. What is the other agent really trying to accomplish? They probably just want to understand why they didn't get hired. There's no indication of anything else. (This is where you put yourself in their shoes and try to understand from their point of view.) Give them some grace. And consider how YOU would want to be treated if the tables were turned.
Calm your sellers and offer some KIND ways that they can respond to the other agent. Talk them off the ledge and move forward.
You're a SAVVY agent - you got this.
Give the other agent some grace. Give your sellers some grace. Don't turn the situation into a big ol' emotional mess. There's going to be a lot of other REAL issues that might pop up and if you start the beginning of their experience with a shit storm over nothing - then I fear their overall experience is going to be poor.
And what if they blame that on you? Think about that.
Remember, the point of this story is not who is right or wrong. It's not about who the better agent is. It's about how you handle inflamed situations and how just a little bit of grace, can give your client a better experience. It should make you a better agent and even a better leader.